You should never agree to a divorce without at least having a telephone consultation with an attorney. Your case may be simple, but it usually is not as simple as you think it is. I represent both husbands and wives in divorce proceedings, and I will be happy to discuss your
situation with you and explain any rights and obligations you may have which you may not have thought of. I will also discuss with you the potential cost of legal representation.

Divorce (or "dissolution of marriage") involves several separate and distinct matters:

(1) Termination of the marriage, restoring you to the status of an unmarried person. This is the simple part of a divorce.

(2) Alimony (or "spousal support"). Either the husband or the wife may be entitled to temporary support during the litigation and to permanent support thereafter. "Permanent" support is not necessarily permanent: it may be limited to a certain period of time depending on the relative
financial circumstances of the husband and the wife, their ages, their educational and employment backgrounds, their health, and other factors. The amount and duration of spousal support is left to the reasonable discretion of the trial judge. When the supporting spouse
dies, his or her obligation to pay support terminates.

(3) Child support is almost always payable by one parent to the other. Usually the parent who provides the child's primary home receives child support from the other parent. The amount depends on the relative financial circumstances of the parents, the amount of time the child
spends with each parent, the number of children each parent has from other relationships, and other factors. The amount and duration of child support is fixed by statute (and computer programs) and the trial judge has very little discretion to vary from the statutory child support guidelines which have been fixed by the state legislature. Child support is payable until the child reaches 18 years; after that, child support continues if the child is still in high school until he or she graduates, quits, or reaches 19 years of age. When the supporting parent dies, his or her obligation to pay child support continues and his or her estate can be required to continue making the payments.

(4) Child custody and visitation. Unless the parents agree on custody and visitation, they are required by law to attend orientation and mediation sessions at Family Court Services, an agency which is an adjunct of the family court. Discord between the parents creates very
serious problems for their children, and it is therefore the goal of California's family law to help the parents minimize the impact of their separation and divorce on the children by helping them work together as parents even while they are disagreeing on everything else. The law
assumes that the child is best served by spending a lot of time with each parent; that means substantial "visitation" time with the parent who does not have primary physical custody. (There is an obvious exception, of course, if one parent is seriously abusing a child, sexually or otherwise.)

(5) Division of community property including assets and debts. The law requires that the community property be divided equally between the husband and wife, unless they agree to a different division. There are special rules for personal injury damages. Community assets include all assets acquired between the date of marriage of the date of separation, with a few exceptions such as gifts and inheritances. Any retirement benefits which accrue during the marriage are community property. Community debts include all obligations incurred by either the husbandor the wife during the marriage. The husband and wife have mutual fiduciary obligations to one another, and either one may therefore be charged for community assets which he or she gives away without the consent the other spouse. During the divorce proceeding the law requires each spouse to fully disclose to the other all assets and debts
including business opportunities known to him or her. Separate property of either spouse is not divided. Separate property includes property acquired before the marriage, after separation, and sometimes during the marriage. This is an area of the law which no one should ever try to
deal with without the advice of a lawyer because of its many complications, and because a mistake may have very long term adverse consequences.